Calming the Green-Eyed Jealousy Monster

Jealousy is a feeling all of us have to deal with at some point, and children are no exception. It can be anything from school grades, types of trainers, sporting achievement or good old fashioned sibling rivalry. Jealousy sparks big feelings in us – so how to support your child with defeating the green-eyed monster? Continue reading

Positive Self Talk – and Why it Matters

Our thoughts determine our actions – if we are in the habit of positive self-talk and positive thinking, we find that we can do things and marvel at our successes. However, all too often our internal chatter  is very negative; we can’t, we are stupid, people will laugh at me. Here are some tips on turning off the negative – and switching on the positive with yourself – and your children. Continue reading

10 Benefits of Taking Risks

Taking risks is important for children and teens – this doesn’t mean being reckless or placing themselves in danger, but having a positive attitude to stepping out of your comfort zone is a key life skill – and there are so many advantages.

 

As a parent you want your child to be safe – and protect them from any kind of hurt or harm. Realistically, I am afraid, this isn´t possible and it´s all too easy to be  over protective. Stopping children from trying new things  actually means they learn to fear taking  risks  – and they seek to continually stay in their comfort zone. In this way, children can become very limited in their ability to become resilient or overcome their fears. So, as always, it´s about balance. Even when things go wrong, that in itself is a valuable learning experience – no matter how bad the experience, we can always take a positive lesson from it, if we seek to.

Our comfort zones are exactly that – safe and stable. Nothing will change for the better if we insist on staying in them. Change will happen through external forces – but those who seek to only stay in the comfort zone begin to fear and resent those external forces. Those who proactively seek to change and control things on their own terms, however, are those who ultimately lead a more fulfilling and happy life. Change IS scary sometimes – however, it´s usually nowhere near as scary if we are the ones to “seize the day” and make it happen.

 

Benefits of taking risks

  1. Children learn and experience new and exiting things – they discover new things about themselves and what they do (and do not) like to do.
  2. They meet new people and form new friendships and relationships
  3. They learn how to handle it when things go wrong and this in turn can help them develop a sense of resilience and responsibility for their own actions.
  4. They learn to challenge themselves – to continually progress and learn more and more things – they develop a love of learning and a passion to succeed.
  5. They do not fear challenges – rather they embrace it and seek to continually try new things.
  6. Taking risks means you have greater confidence and are not afraid of failure.
  7. You are inspired by, rather than threatened by others, and develop a “give it a go” attitude rather than judging or criticizing others for taking a risk.
  8. Children who take risks learn from their mistakes, learn new life skills and inspire others.
  9. Risk taking fosters a love of resilience and perseverance – and children who take risks are more likely to acknowledge and celebrate their success and achievements – this boosting their self-esteem
  10. It´s the difference between living life and watching it go by – far better to join the party, than sit on the sidelines. Yes – children (and adults) who take risks are happier, have more fun and attract more positivity into their lives.

So go on – take a risk and let me know what you did and how you got on!

 

 

 

Overcoming Self Doubt

It is normal that every now and then we doubt ourselves. Did we say the right thing, offend someone or could we have reacted in a more positive or self-assured way? Self doubt is normal, but more and more children and young adults are basing their self worth on the values and opinions of others. Continue reading

Kindness Makes the World go Round

To be kind is one of life´s virtues. It says a great deal about who we are as a person. It reflects how we respect and treat others and ourselves, and how we wish to be seen in the grand scheme of things. Continue reading

The Importance of Good Manners

Good manners matter – they cost nothing yet can mean a great deal to others. They make a positive difference and a lasting impression, yet so many young people are failing to be “well mannered” – but at what cost?

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Don´t touch me like that – how to handle embarrassing conversations

It is right that we all have control over who touches our body and how they touch it -and as children get older, they need more control over who touches them, and in what way. No means no and more often than not we need to help children to have  these conversations with others. Continue reading

Let´s PLAY! (And create few happy habits at the same time!)

Ever miss the days when life was so much simpler and there was a lot more fun around? Children have so much fun playing – when do we loose that spark for fun and creativity? Continue reading

Having a Bad Reputation – and What they can do about it

Does your child have a bad reputation at school? The problem with bad reputations is that they are easy to get – and tricky to shake off. Happily, there are things they can do to start taking back control and making life a lot less lonely. Continue reading

How to Make time for Downtime – and Why it is SO important: A Spookje Story

Are you and your children constantly busy and on the go, with little or no downtime? The importance of being mindful and taking time out has never been more important. Continue reading

Spookje Stories: I HATE YOU! Bad Moods Impact on Everyone

Watch out – he´s in a bad mood  AND IT IS ALL YOUR FAULT

Ever had your head completely bitten off by your kids (or a colleague, friend or partner)  for absolutely no reason – but suddenly you feel like you did something wrong? Continue reading

Spookje Stories: Happiness – Being Happy and Keeping that Feeling

happy, happier, happiest – happiness

It’s so lovely when your children are in a great mood, are delightful to spend time with, follow all the rules,  don’t argue….. and then BANG something happens and it’s all changed. Continue reading

Spookje Stories: Keeping Clean

Having trouble getting your kids to keep themselves clean?

As adults we know an important part of self-care is keeping ourselves clean, brushing our teeth, washing our faces, bodies and hair – yet somethings children do not see the importance of these simple things. Continue reading

Spookje Stories – SNOTTY NOSE!

At times we all get colds – so what can you do to enable your child to look after their snotty nose? Snot is never a good look on anyone – not cats, kids or grown-ups! Continue reading

Welcome to the Spookje Stories!

Hello and welcome to the Spookje Stories!  Ever wonder what your children do on their computer and iPads all day? Well, one thing they are doing is spending a great deal of time on YouTube. “You tubers” have a massive following these days. So, meet the latest You tuber – my cat – Spookje! Continue reading

praise

7 Ways to Give Compliments and Praise – and Make It Meaningful

Done correctly, praise can be motivating; it serves to validate our pride and pleasure in our achievements. The ugly truth however, is that much of the praise we give can be demeaning, insincere and detrimental to self-esteem. Continue reading

love

The Benefits of Saying, “I love you,” to Your Kids – and Tips on How to Say It

Love – never has something been so prolifically written or sung about, lamented or celebrated. Experts all agree that feeling and knowing that we are loved can improve our self-esteem and enhance our feeling of being accepted in the world. Feeling loved boosts self-esteem, fosters an environment of trust and self-confidence, lessens the fear of making mistakes and increases in children the confidence to try new things. It enables them to feel part of something bigger than themselves, that they are important and valued. Children who grow up feeling loved, go onto be more successful in relationships when they are older.

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